Why I Gave Up on New Year's Resolutions

We've all made them:
"I will lose weight."
"I will be organized."
"I will be a better, kinder, gentler person."
"I will be more thrifty."
And on and on and on it goes, ad infinitum, of things we will do, should do, and have the best intentions of doing and never do. I'm breaking up with you NYE resolution. It's not you, it's me. The minute I promise myself I'm going to do something to improve my life, the self-destruct sequence starts counting down in my head. I self-sabotage, avoid, procrastinate, and ignore the promises I made to myself.

Not this year! Because I refuse to fall prey to the resolutions ploys of "it will be different this time," and "I'm a changed person."  Lies, all of them.  This year, I have projects.  They have deadlines, but they are relatively relaxed, and if I don't complete something within the timeline, it's ok. I can't use them as excuses to beat upon myself because they have absolutely nothing to do with my health, my finances, or my attitude (well, sort of).  They're fun. They're satisfying. And I have chosen my projects because they will feed me in ways that I know I am lacking.  I am not feeding my little feathered thing that perches in my soul very well, and it has turned evil and is plotting revolutions and mutinies on my well-being. It also has a potty-mouth when it comes to my self-confidence. I am rising up and cramming art and writing and creating down it's crabby little beak.

My first project involves all of them and it is a project in itself. And it's this. My blog. I have another blog, Eatie Gourmet that I was faithful to for a while and then it fell by the wayside. Then, I created one specifically for a particular NYE resolution and it had one post on it. ONE. So, obviously, you can see how that went. This project is to just commit to one blog, and write about everything in this one blog. So, your going to see the progression of some of my other projects within this blog (how meta).  It's also designed to keep me honest, and keep me going on the rest of my endeavors.  There will be a little bit of everything here: art, food, writing, personal journey, and libraryland stuff. So, if one of those things doesn't interest you, just skip it. Note that I presume that there will be people that will want to read this blog. How vain of me. It matters not. What matters is I have a place to put down my thoughts and feelings, my frustrations, my triumphs and failures, and hope that somewhere, somehow along the way I learn something. And if you want to follow along in my journey, because face it, humans are naturally voyeuristic, then do so. I promise you will at least find a couple worthwhile recipes in the flotsam and jetsam.

So, my other two major projects are:
1. Each month, I choose an artist, and by the end of the month I have to have at least created one piece that is inspired by that artist. Be it technique, medium, subject matter, or outright emulation, it will correspond to the artist in some way.  I will probably do research about the artist, because it's what I do, and for my own guidelines I'm insisting that the final piece be larger than 8x12. I am notorious for working small, and need to expand my size and get out of my habit of tight, precise art that I end up overworking or hating. My friend Pamela is doing a similar project, in fact, it was her idea, so credit where credit is due.  It's a brilliant idea.

2. I have an unnatural addiction to amateur cookbooks. You know the ones I'm talking about - the St. James Lutheran Church, the Ladies Garden Society, the Lutheran Women's Aid Society, the First Baptist Koffee Klatch.  So, I want to start cooking my way through some of the cookbooks I own and collect the best of the best.  I also would love to try and find some of the ladies that might have contributed to these cookbooks. When I read their recipes, I can't help but think about their lives. Were they Depression babies? Were they children of Depression babies? Did they survive multiple wars? The Dust Bowl?  The Farm Crisis?  Why did they choose this recipe above all the others?  Did they think it was the best tasting? The easiest? Or were there fond memories attached to this recipe?  In the process, I want to collect recipes from my Facebook friends and make a FB Friend cookbook that everyone can receive digitally.  But I'm going to ask for the stories behind them. Food is a powerful memory trigger for many of us, and I want to dig deep in that phenomenon, and have a cookbook that I can treasure and pass down to nephews and nieces someday.

So here's to keeping me honest.  And my projects.  And burning all those love letters that Resolution sent me.